Postcard: 'Cheese Alert'

ÝThe mysterious and highly expensive 'Cheese Levy' was a satirical jab at high fuel duties at the time I dreamt it up, way back in 2002. It's been an amusing sideline (I wish) since then, and I thought I'd upgrade it to subplot status. Ever since reading the 'Journey from Liverpool with a cheese' story in Three Men in a Boat, I've always thought cheese was just, well funny. I always thought the illegal cheese market in Thursday's word was a bit of harmless fun, and so did she - until the arrival of X-14, a cheese so powerful it has to be kept chained down.

This was taken in my kitchen, with the table pushed into the corner. The screws are only the heads stuck into the plates; the one in the wall is blue-tacked on.

Colour postcard, unnumbered, given out on UK/US tour for First Among Sequels July/August 2007. 1000 editions.